I think we clearly have different ideas on what a dad joke is
I wouldnt repeat alot of the jokes showing up lately to any kid( regardless if how funny). I feel like weve lost our way. Im no purist but theres plenty of other reddits for those jokes. :/
What do you call one thousand Millie Bobby Browns
Bobby Brown
I was in the bar last night when the waitress yells "Does anyone know CPR?"I yelled back "I know all those letters!"
Everyone laughed, well except this one guy.
“Knock Knock” “Who is it?” “Dishes” “Dishes who”
Dishes a bad joke
What do you call a prostitute who is bad at sex?
Whore-ible.
I told my son, “Did you know when William the Conqueror took England that he made all the English lords get rid of the water around their castles so he could control them more easily”. “Did he really?”
“Yeh thats right. They were all de-moated.”
I’ve started investing in stocks. Chicken, beef and vegetable. I know it’s risky…
But with any luck, I’ll become a bouillionaire
Why does Peter Pan always fly?
Because he can never, never land.
The guy remodeling my kitchen just got arrested!
Charged with counter-fitting.
What gets longer if pulled, fits snugly between boobs, slides neatly into a hole, chokes people when used incorrectly, and works well when jerked?
A seatbelt
What do you call a boyband that plays classical music?
The bach street boys
I wanted to share a joke that's slightly NSFW with you all, but knowing how people in this sub are. It'll just be removed.
[Removed]
I asked my son why he put popcorn in the freezer....
He said he wanted a pop-sicle.
Me: I need a battery so I can tell the timeCashier: Is it for a clock?
Me: I don’t know. That’s why I need a battery
Sean Connery jokeWhat time does Sean Connery get to Wimbledon?
Tennish.
I told a dad joke on an airplane
It went over like a million people's heads
What type of fruit likes to go down slides?
A kiweeeeee!
What is Peter Parker's college major?
Web Design
Helped a duck get some fishing line off its foot. He offered to pay me for my efforts.
I told him I would put it on his bill.
I saw my son just throw two watches into the ocean
He said he is syncing them
Knock knock.Who’s there?
A little old lady.
A little old lady who?
Oh, I didn’t know you could yodel.
What did the chiropractor say after becoming a therapist?
I got your back
How much did the pirate charge for corn?
A buck an ear.
I’m disgusted by all the people who are STILL making jokes about the missing titanic sub!!!
It’s unthinkable!!
My friend Tony asked me not to say his name backwards
I said Y NOT
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