What is a word that starts and ends with the same letter, and has a little laugh in it?
You will smile when you realize that is the answer.
What do you call a small green legume that rolls off your plate?
An escaPEA! (I’m here all week. Please tip your server.)
Got a solid groan on this one...
My daughter wanted me to take her shopping at "The Hot Topic" at the mall. I said that store is too edgy and we should go shopping at The Warm Subject instead. Waka Waka...
I was once arrested for robbing a tire store
They charged me with armed rubbery
Someone swapped my antidepressants for Viagra
It's been a hard day to get through.
What should you do if you’re attacked by a group of clowns?
Go straight for the juggler
What do you call a cows knees?
A burger joint
this halloween, my costume will be simply carrying a sausage in a beer mug.
i will be frank and stein.
How many ants can you fit in a rental property.
Ten. Ten ants.
Why can't the cat have control of the TV remote......
Because it will keep hitting the paws button.....
What do you call a knight that loves playing video games with his friends?
Sir LANs-A-Lot
Realizing my wife is going to need an oxygen tank for the rest of her life,
because I took her breath away every time she looks at me.
To the person who stole my antidepressant tablets
I hope you're happy now.
Monsters don’t like to eat ghosts because…
they taste like sheet
Two slices of bread went on a date.
It was loaf at first sight.
Just as I was off to college , my dad and I got some last minute bits from the shop..As he reached for the anti persperant, he made sure to tell me.to.never buy the ones at the very front as they have likely been used as testers several timesI told him , This ain't my first roll deo
he said , Bye Son
What's the opposite of a grandpa?
A petit pa.
Never go to bed hungry
You might not be able to sleep because of insomnomnomnomnia
Wrestling is stupid.
It's just guys without pants, fighting for a belt.
What would you call a Norwegian magician?
A wizard of Oslo.
What do you call a reality TV show for really bad tennis players?
Love Island
Tums.
Tums is missing out on selling pumpkin spice flavored antacid and calling it Autums.
My doctor's fees are very fair.
I pay a fare for the visit, a fare for the blood work, a fare for the follow-up.
Did you hear about the guy who invented the "knock-knock" joke?
He won the "no-bell" prize.
What did the annoyed baker shout at her bread?
Don't you start with me, sourdough!
top
